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OCT 26 2001
it's friday night and i am working. after tonight i will have worked an 80
hour week. while everyone trickled out to enjoy the weekend, i am here in
the office working. i am not bitter though. it just feels weird. weird is
that all encompassing feeling. i feel weird about a lot of stuff. anything
that's out of the ordinary feels weird. tonight definitely feels weird. the
office is silent, other than the hum of the ventilation system and the noise
of typed keyboard keys. i am not too tired, nor am i fully awake. it feels
peaceful. if i have to be that guy who stays late on the weekend while
everyone else is enjoying themselves in order for the project to be
complete, i am perfectly happy to be that guy. just don't count on me being
that guy for too many weekends. what am i missing tonight? i am missing a
squid country safari halloween party. i didn't really have time to come up
with a costume anyway, but the decision to not go was sort of decided for me
by the schedule of this project. i would've liked to have gone. i've been to
their halloween party for the past 2 years, this is my first year missing
it. i am missing either some world series or some dark angel action on
television. other than that, i really didn't have any weekend plans. sure,
it would've been nice to be at home and relaxing, but you play the hand that
fate deals you. at this point, i just want to get this project done, taste
that post-project euphoria. it's close, i just have to stay focused, stay
relaxed, stay motivated. i think back to all the other projects i've done
over the half decade i've been working. projects always get done, for better
or worse. it might be painful (most of the time i count on a little pain),
but they come through in the end. i'm definitely less bitter, less
disgruntled tonight. maybe it was that run around the charles river right
after regular work (5pm). nothing like a punishing run on my body to ease
some of that tension. maybe it was the hot shower afterwards. whatever it
was, it seemed to have done the trick. if there's one night to be angry, if
there's one night to be disgruntled, it'd be friday night working at the
office. but i'm not.
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